zondag 28 september 2008

friction


Hi,
today I remember how I as a child was taken by my parents and dragged (as I felt it) to other places to meet people, family, friends. I didn't grasp the meaning of it. What was all the fuzz about. The excitement, what was going on in the meeting? A lot of talking, emotions now and than. 
I feel myself the same way, as I want to go to my modelairplaneclub, where is a barbecue, (partytime! lets kill some animals!). 
I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to feel as a child, dragged to meetings.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to feel as a child, familymeetings as pointless.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to see as a child, familymeetings as chaotic.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed in myself to feel emotional pain for the killing of animals for the purpose of  a party.

I sustained this judgement till today, by dragging myself to other places, seemingly enjoying this.
I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to enjoy dragging myself to other places.

Thanks.

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